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Joke of the Day
"How did the executioner learn about knots? By watching the noose."
Next Joke
"Where do poor meatballs live? In the Spaghetto. (I 've seen this on reddit before, one of my all time favorites though!)"
"A boomerang walks into a bar... Bartender says, ""Hey, I thought I threw you out of here!"""
"My partner is a dog person, I'm not. Gets really fucking inconvenient every full moon."
"Hey girl, are you a gorilla enclosure.. Because I wanna drop a baby in you"
"""You want to see a pig with three eyes?"" A piiig"
"Lifehack: If whenever someone asks your opinion on something you say, ""Now thats-a spicy meatball!"" people will learn not to ask you things."
"The past, present and future walk into a room. It got all tense."
"The interviewer asked me, ""What's your worst quality?"" I said, ""I tend to speak my mind."" He said, ""I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing..."" I said, ""I don't give a fuck what you think."""
"I would never let my kids go see an orchestra... Too much sax and violins."