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Joke of the Day
"2 guys walk into a bar The 3rd guy ducks"
Next Joke
"Her: How in the world did we max out the credit card?? Me: Beats me *pushes $20K worth of Care Bears under the bed"
"What did the tsundere degree say to the radian? ""Notice me 10"""
"Murphy's wife told him he should put a pair of clean socks on every day. By Friday he couldn't get his boots on."
"Woman: When my husband died... ...his dying wish was to be liquidised into perfume. Friend: It's so sad that he's gone. Woman: Well he's still here in essence."
"There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live."
"What happened when Hitler lost his glasses? He could Nazi."
"Me: My son totaled another car. Progressive: I see that you insure 3 teen sons? M: yes P: *covers phone* HEY GUYS, WE'RE GOING TO ARUBA!"
"Had a conversation with my ex-wife over a drink this afternoon. It was cordial."
"I'd like to meet a failed scientist, like I do writers. ""I science on the weekends and for free sometimes. I think of it more as a hobby."""