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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a Viking pop band with a big gay following? The Pillage People."

"What do colleges and penises have in common? They're both long and hard, unless you're Asian."

"Why did the physicist throw out his shag rug? He assumed the lawnmower was a vacuum"

"Hey, if anyone needs help raising their kids, come talk to me. I've been one for 30 some years now."

"Why did Snow White buy an android phone? She thought the apple was poisoned."

"Tolkien once wrote a novel set in an office... It's titled, ""And My Fax""."

"I decided for dinner to make the Duck confit As I was in a really fowl mood."

"Don't move, I know what I'm doing. *takes a nap"

"I'm glad the unbelievably loud teenagers on this flight are all white so I can hate them."

"What did Frank say when he dropped his last slice of Pizza Hut in the toilet? ""Pizza shit"""