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Joke of the Day

"To err is human... To arr is pirate."

"LPT before weighing yourself, take a poop... You'll weigh a shit load less."

"I was only young when I learned to count. It was odd at first, even then."

"What is a jockey's motto? Put your money where your mount is!"

"How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowplow? Get the bitch a shovel."

"There was a fire at the Yankee Candle store. 8 killed. 19 injured. 1200 soothed."

"What did King Arthur have for breakfast? Eggcalibur."

"What job can you see yourself doing? Inspecting mirrors"

"Why did the redneck take his cat to Walmart after running over it's tail with the lawn mower? Because they're the largest re-tail-er"

"An old Scottish joke. What's the difference between Bing Crosby and Walt Disney? Bing sings and Walt Disney."