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Joke of the Day
"why do mice have such small balls? They can't dance very well."
Next Joke
"aesop: man what you did was not cool. like imagine if a fox did what you did to me, and i was a goose. that makes it much clearer right?"
"Keyboard Humor. Finds a ESC key from a keyboard on the floor, make the shity pun; ""the Esc key escaped."""
"How much does a pirate pay for an ear piercing? A buck an ear"
"How was copper wire invented? Two Jews fighting over a penny."
"A woman runs into a panhandler on the street... Panhandler: ""Would you please spare me some change? I haven't eaten in three days.."" Woman: ""Well, you've gotta force yourself."""
"Now that pinterest, instagram and netflix are down, I think I'm just going to spend the weekend learning the names of my children."
"When I lost my rifle, the Army charged me $85 That's why in the Navy, the captain goes down with the ship EDIT: Didn't excpect to get this many upvotes. Thanks!"
"Me: Rest assured I will go to the grave with your secret. Pat: Thank you. Me: Unfortunately so will my golfing buddies."
"Username goes to the store. He buys three oranges and goes to the till. Username checks out."