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Joke of the Day

"I have finally figured out how to clone a human being! Needless to say, I am beside myself."

"Sometimes you have to choose between what is hard and what is easy Luckily for you I'm both right now"

"When I'm sad I go to the fabric softener aisle of a store & imagine I'm in the clean mountains surrounded by blue sparkles and wild flowers."

"A boy said to his father one day, ""Dad, when I grow up I want to be a musician."" His father responded, ""I'm sorry, son, you can't have it both ways."""

"What's the Pope's least favorite human bone? The blasphemur."

"If I followed you home, would you keep me?"

"I've heard that Americans don't find paedo jokes funny Guess they're just a bit touchy"

"A news report says hackers stole $1 Billion dollars from banks around the world. And several pens."

"Why does Trump wear a hairpiece? Because he thought the kids on the roller coaster were making fun of him when they shouted ""Donald, duck!"" Yep."

"What's the most common illness affecting neckbeards? M'laise."