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Joke of the Day

"What is the question most frequently asked by a philosopher? Would you like ketchup with your chips?"

"I just hit a Smart car and now it's my hood ornament."

"What's the difference between a rooster and a prostitute the rooster says cockadoodledoo a prostitute says anycockwilldo"

"How many Emos does it take to change a light bulb? None. They prefer to cry in the dark."

"What's the difference between George Michael and Carrie Fisher? Two days."

"A woman walks into a brothel, slaps down a few hundred dollars, and exclaims, ""I want twelve inches, and I want them to hurt!"" So the doorman smacks her face with a ruler."

"The first rule of winter sex The one who has a running nose has to be under the other."

"I think the best thing about being a cyclops is no one would notice if you had a lazy eye."

"Heard a Beethoven piece & a Ke$ha song yesterday. Which one is deaf again?"

"Two Trump supporters are walking side by side. After a while, one asks the other ""Can I walk in the middle now?"""