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Joke of the Day

"Why did Rosemary get kicked out of the spice rack? For swallowing Poppy's Seed"

"I honked at the funeral procession out of SUPPORT"

"Why did the Egyptians build the pyramids? To get to the other side."

"Where do war generals make decisions? In a think tank"

"Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere"

"What did the doctor say to the speeding commuter? Thank you for your patients."

"What do feminists and Redditors have in common? They both have multiple triggers that will cause them to down vote those who don't think the exact same way as them."

"[first date] Her: I just love eating clean and staying healthy, you know? Me:*flashback to the time I cry-ate two lasagnas* Totally"

"12 Signs You Might Have Leprosy - Number 8 is jaw-dropping!"

"Maybe I'll starting bringing a spray bottle and treat them like misbehaving cats. ""NO!"" *Shoots person in face*"