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Joke of the Day
"Why was the tank top more gangster than the tube top? The tube top was strapless."
Next Joke
"How do you measure a Villanova graduate's I.Q.? With a tire gauge."
"I was just awarded a trophy for laziness. All I need now is for someone to accept it on my behalf."
"My Wife's Accident The police knocked on my door last night, ""It looks like your wife has been in an accident,"" said one officer. ""I know,"" I replied, ""but she's good with the kids."""
"That good buddy on Facebook who likes your status because nobody else will."
"Change is hard. I mean, have you ever tried to bend a quarter?"
"Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread."
"If you drive a Hummer, I will assume you are a douchebag. If aforementioned Hummer is bright yellow, I will crown you their king."
"Q: Why are orchestra intermissions only twenty minutes long? A: So the violists don't need to be retrained."
"What do cat actors say on stage ? Tabby or not tabby !"