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Joke of the Day

"Most women have a love hate relationship with their scale, but I'm convinced mine goes out of her way to piss me off."

"Saw this movie about Jewish people this afternoon.. It had a hollow cast."

"Volkswagen upset a lot of people by not using AdBlue in their TDI engines... ...they really took the piss out of clean diesel."

"Why do single people take dating advice from other single people? That's like Stevie Wonder giving Ray Charles driving directions."

"Who's the wost president ever? Guess we'll find out in January."

"Canceling my subscription!! I'm tired of your issues."

"Whats an Australian Kiss? (nsfw-ish) It's like a French kiss, but down under."

"Knock knock Heisenberg Knock knock Who's there I am the one who knocks I am the one who knocks who You know exactly who I am say my name Heisenberg You're goddamn right."

"What's black and doesn't work? [Very NSFW] Bryce Williams' sense of perspective."

"Calling your girlfriend by her Moms name during a fight is a great way to escalate the situation."