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Joke of the Day

"So two men walk into a bar... Which is weird. You'd think the second one would have noticed it!"

"A seal walks into a club... _"

"What did the German physicist call his beer mug? Ein stein."

"Right now, a future teen mom is applying copious amounts of body glitter to herself."

"My parents are divorced. I feel fat and all the other girls my age have boyfriends. Him: Being a teenager is tough. Me: *sigh* I'm 40."

"How does Tom Brady like his soda? Flat."

"What happened to Frankenstein's stupid son? He had so much wax in his ears that he became a permanent contributor to Madame Tussaud's."

"""Relax. It's not a competition."" ""Right. That's what I say."" ""But I said it first."""

"My 6 year old Niece's Joke What did the Hippie say to the invisible elephant? Hey dude, you're outta sight!"

"NALA: Why can't you be the king I know? The king you have inside you? SIMBA: That doesn't make sense. I think I'd remember if I ate a king."