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Joke of the Day

"Wanna expand my polynomial?"

"I believe in boobs at first sight."

"How do you titillate an ocelot? You oscillate its tit a lot!"

"What does a feminist and a tampon have in common? They're both stuck up cunts."

"I almost crashed into the semi in front of me while I was looking at a hot construction worker. That would've been an embarrassing obituary."

"I have a phobia of over engineered buildings It's a complex complex complex."

"""And how's yer wife Pat?"" ""Sure she do be awful sick."" ""Is ut dangerous she is?"" ""No she's too weak t' be dangerous anymore!"""

"You gotta kiss a lotta frogs to get a lotta desperate late-night texts from frogs."

"Q: What's the difference between Bill Clinton and Joseph Stalin? A: Some of Stalin's subjects admired him."

"How to be an asian... Just squint your eyes and say ""We all how smaw deek"" out loud."