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Joke of the Day

"Mitt Romney says that people who are voting for Barack Obama don't work and don't pay taxes. I guess that means Romney is voting for Obama."

"Mona Lisa 1o acto:Una mona aplastada. 2o acto: La misma mona aplastada. 3o acto: La misma mona aplastada. Como se llama la obra? ""La Mona Lisa."""

"I have controversial opinions and I don't give a shit what anyone thinks! (Refreshes eight times to see faves and retweets)"

"If M. Night Shyamalan told a knock-knock joke. * Knock knock. * ""Who's there?"" * ""M. Night Shyamalan."" * ""M. Night Shyamalan who?"" * ""Nah, I'm just messing with you. I was inside the whole time."""

"Where should Aaron Hernandez have hidden the evidence? The Cowboys' endzone; because no one goes there"

"Just thought of one: Why is an abortionist good to have on your team? If you conceive something, they can execute it."

"You can read his mind in his face. Yes it's usually a complete blank."

"What do you get when you administer marijuana to cows? High steaks! (I'll just see my way out...)"

"I made a joke about someone getting knocked out... ...but I forgot the punchline."

"If you look long enough and hard enough you could make a lot of money doing porn."