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Joke of the Day
"Feel free to use the ""or less"" feature of your 140 characters."
Next Joke
"What does Batman like in his lemonade? Just ice."
"Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: for a totally legitimate reason Now start fucking laughing"
"What DOESN'T Bruce want for Christmas from his ex? A Krismas goose."
"People who carry their dogs around, You know they can walk, right? Theyre real good at it. It's like one of the top known things about dogs"
"My girlfriend went to get her test results from the doctor today and it was bad news. He confirmed I'm about to become a husband."
"""Please don't put a million dumb photos of me on your Facebook... it just annoys your friends"" Every baby"
"If you're 17 and your 200 year old lover won't turn you into a vampire so you can be together forever, he's just not that into you."
"Fat women are like hydrogen single and abundant"
"But you didn't pick up Two Types of People: ---- 1. I called you but you didn't pickup ---- 2. I called you from my iPhone 6 Plus 64 GB and you didn't pickup."