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Joke of the Day

"AMA I left the Church of Scientology two weeks ago [Deleted]"

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"95% of the men's fashion budget on 'American Idol' goes to leather cuff bracelets and wallet chains."
"A man drops his watch........ And he notices his dog is about to piss on it. The man says ""Oh no you don't, not on my watch!"""
"what do you call an acid with an attitude? A-mean-oh acid"
"What`s the definition of a misogynist? A man who hates every bone in the female body... except his own."
"Sorry I changed your ringtone to Salt-N-Pepa's ""push it"" and called you a bunch of times during your colonoscopy."
"How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb? None. That's a hardware problem."
"What do you call it when a midget realizes he's gay? Coming out of the cupboard."
"One woodworm met another. ""How's life?"" she asked. ""Oh same as usual"" he replied ""boring."""
"If your playing the guitar just remember one thing Dont finger a minor you could get arrested for that."