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Joke of the Day

"I woke up to a blow job this morning... That's the last time I fall asleep on the train with my mouth open."

"She was only a lumberjack's daughter ... ... but she always gave me wood."

"Is your ass the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty? Cause your booty is disarming"

"What's the difference between a kid and a drawer? A drawer won't scream when I force my junk into it."

"If you're only 18, please don't post philosophy and proverb verbiage based on your first love and the difficulty of your inexperienced life."

"Coca-cola should make a Coca-cola flavored candy cane and call it a Coke Cane."

"the crow was calling my name thought cah"

"I want my tombstone to read: Don't feel too bad, he really liked sleeping"

"Shortest maths joke < 0"

"This morning, 50 Cent announced he's filing for bankruptcy. He also announced he'll be touring with Nickelback to recoup 10% of his losses."