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Joke of the Day

"What do you call the deaf man with no limbs? Whatever you want."

"What do you call a bear in the rain? Drizzly bear."

"Judge: ""Micky, I can't grant you a divorce from Minnie Mouse, because she is not crazy"" ""I didn't say she was crazy Judge, I said she was fucking Goofy"""

"What does a German snake say? "

"My wife calls it ""woman's intuition"" but I call it ""not clearing your browser history."""

"How many tickles does it take to make an octupus laugh? Ten tickles."

"Why do black people keep the brims of their hats flat? So birds don't shit on their lips."

"In the motorcycle safety course they tell you that target fixation is bad, where your eyes are looking is where you usually end up. Must be why I keep running over female joggers."

"Time for a joke. ""Dad, how do you feel about abortions?"" ""Well, why don't you ask your sister?"" ""But I don't have a..."""

"So 2 trains crashed in Germany today... Lets just hope the train wasn't going to Auschwitz or more then Germans would have gotten injured."