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Joke of the Day

"""Q. Why were India kicked out of the Soccer world Cup held in England in 1966 ? A. Every time they were given a corner, they built a shop."""

"A senior partner with a herniated disc limps into a conference room Coworker 1: ""I feel like the world's moving in slow motion"" (pause) Coworker 1: ""Oh wait, it's just Charlie"" (motions at partner)"

"What did one gay sperm say to the other? How are we supposed to find an egg in all this shit?"

"Roses are red... Harambes in heaven, George Bush had advanced knowledge of 9/11."

"What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? ""Hold onto your nuts, this ain't no ordinary blow job."""

"Movie Ratings Explained G: Nobody gets the girl. PG: The good guy gets the girl. R: The bad guy gets the girl. X: Everybody gets the girl!"

"What's the difference between a toddler and a handgun? A handgun can't suck a dick."

"A man walks into a bar He asks the bartender, ""Do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?"" The bartender shakes his head and says, ""No, we only have plain."""

"Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips."

"Some people are looking for the meaning of life. I'm still looking for the meaning of I licky boom boom down."