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Joke of the Day

"A senior partner with a herniated disc limps into a conference room Coworker 1: ""I feel like the world's moving in slow motion"" (pause) Coworker 1: ""Oh wait, it's just Charlie"" (motions at partner)"

Next Joke
 
"Thought of this joke a few years ago and thought id share it with you beautiful people Why cant bulimics be pitchers in baseball? Because they always throw up"
"Here's one for you...! 1"
"Everyone talks about how May 4th is 100% hands down the best Star Wars holiday ever.... But only a fifth May deal in absolutes.."
"If there are three gay guys in a bath and a lump of cum floats to the surface, what do they say? Who farted?"
"What has two legs and is bleeding all over the fucking rug? Half a dog"
"Yo mama is so fat ... she might die from a Cardiovascular Disease"
"The camping shop in Stratford-upon-Avon is having a sale of last season's stock. Their slogan....? Now.. is the winter of our discount tents."
"oh hey mom. no i'm just Skyping with my girlfriend. what do you mean am i just playing a Vine of a girl saying i love you over and over"
"chevy badge on a holdern upvote if you think they're gay"