72699

Joke of the Day

"Ooopppsss Q: What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? A: You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish"

"If your parachute doesn't deploy... You have the rest of your life to fix it."

"Being a child is like being drunk. Everybody remembers what you did exept you."

"What's with these people who take a sip of their coffee as soon as they get it? Who are these iron-mouthed warriors?"

"What kind of reptile loves to start shit? An insta-gator"

"What's the last thing that goes through a bugs mind when it hits your windshield? It's ass."

"What does Axl Rose do before he prays? Gets down on his SHA-NA-NA-NA-NA-KNEES!? KNEES!"

"Just spent 3 hours making a belt out of all my old watches... ...it was a complete waste of time."

"I can hear my girlfriend in the other room cleaning up my cat's pee. As soon as I think she's done, I'm going to yell out ""I'll do it babe!"""

"I made this joke up. Man 1: Hey, I haven't seen you in a few days. What's up? Man 2: Oh, I went pearl diving in Ming Chao. Man 1: Oh? Where's Ming Chao? Man 2: She's getting dressed."