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Joke of the Day

"I Like My Women Like I Like My Coffee.... Well educated, independent, pretty looking and doesn't nag all day"

"What do composers prepare their ingredients on? A Chopin board"

"With Tim Cook being gay and all... It's no wonder he likes dongles so much."

"It's hard to tell a joke to Thieves... They always take things, literally."

"When a woman says ""WHAT did you just say?"" say something different."

"One person's trigger warning... ...is another person's spoiler alert."

"If I ever go missing and theres a big search party out looking for me, you can save time by not looking at any gyms."

"A joke I made up yesterday . . . Relationships are like socks. They're cool with me, as long as they are the same color."

"Important copyright notice Remember, if you sing ""Happy Birthday"" to the Queen, it is still *not* royalty-free."

"What is the name of a bag pipe band that likes to play while jumping on squares? hopscotts."