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Joke of the Day

"As a gay man with a background in the arts, there's precious little to keep me occupied in prison. To be honest, I just get bored."

"Accidentally shoved a girl I didn't like to the left in the grocery store thinking I was on Tinder."

"wait, do bisexuals experience sexual attraction twice a year or once every two years"

"I once knew this incredibly meticulous man from Taiwan. He was a real Taipei personality."

"5: I want to do something no one else has ever done. Me: Help me clean? 5: No. Something fun."

"What did one snowman say to the other? Smells like carrots!"

"It may have looked like I was doing crunches but I was just trying to get up."

"""Did you check your pockets?"" - kangaroo who's lost a child"

"If smoking is bad for you... Why does it cure salmon?"

"Why should aimless Christian musicians become sailors? Because if they've found Jesus, the only way they'll find resolution is at C."