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Joke of the Day

"The oldest written recipe is for beer. Even when most people couldn't read or write, they knew they had to mark that shit down somehow."

"Drunk Draft Folder Contents: ""Trees. LOL."" ""I was born once. Pickles."" ""Spice Girls"" ""Toes. Are on my feet. Both feet. Not just one."""

"He who laughs first, must be using 3G internet."

"How to you get rid of the dandelions on your lawn? Paint one of them black; the others will move away."

"Our Father, who art in Heaven, Hallowed be thy name But Imma call you ""Hal"" for short, 'k, Chief?"

"What do you call it when someone gets hit by a bus on his way to pay off his student loans? Crippling debt! It's funny because he can't walk anymore!"

"I am trisexual I'll tri sex with anyone"

"Fallout (spoiler) I heard Fallout 4 is a real blast from the past..."

"I like my women like I like my Poke Stops. Ready to go again in 5 minutes."

"A guy walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, ""Do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?"" The bartender shakes his head and says, ""No, we only have plain."""