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Joke of the Day

"Parent/Child conversation tweets are always so cute & sweet! Thought I'd try one: 18: Can I borrow the car? Me: No Wasn't that adorable?!"

"What do you call a big pile of kittens? A meowntain."

"Supposedly anagrams of people's names give you clues to how they're going to die... ... and [Hugh Dennis](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hugh_Dennis) is an anagram of ""hung in shed""."

"Friend: [rubs my shoulder] Aw, honey, your life isn't over. It's just beginning! Me: *sobs even harder"

"Why is the Angel of Death so socially awkward? Because he sucks at life."

"Did you guys hear about the man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray? He turned out to be a seasoned veteran."

"Girl to boy. Girl: What's up ? Boy: If I tell you, will you sit on it ?"

"""You lie like a doge!"" I tell my wife. ""So deceit!"" I add. ""Very fraud!"" I mention. ""Much fiction!"" I point out. ""Wow,"" she says."

"The color black is out drinking with his friends. Black says to the bartender, ""Hey, something isn't right. Where is all the color white?"" Bartender says, ""dude, this is a gray bar."

"They laughed when I said I wanted to be a comedian. Well, no ones laughing now."