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Joke of the Day

"Money may not buy you happiness, but it does buy you all the sh1t you want!"

"Last year I felt depressed and miserable, but this year I've managed to turn it around. Now I feel miserable and depressed."

"I just found the Wand of Transfiguration! This changes everything!"

"If you are considering decorating your car for Christmas, please seek immediate mental help."

"eBay's search feature can be so useless sometimes and other times be equally worthless with overkill. I tried to look up cigarette lighters and they had 13,749 matches."

"What happened to Loki after he wath hit in hith fathe with Odin'th Hammer? He became Thor."

"What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding half a worm."

"Did you hear about the wooden car with the wooden engine and wooden wheels? It wooden move."

"A team of computer scientists just announced their discovery of the new largest prime number. Apparently it's 5x larger than the last one!"

"The worst thing you can do to a woman is to not let her see the picture you just took of her."