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Joke of the Day

"Niagara Falls Viagra lifts!"

"The Commonwealth Games: For when you can't win an Olympic medal."

"Nike actually called me and asked me to stop doing it."

"Well I was going to donate blood today until.... the lady got all personal and started asking, ""Who's blood is this?"" and ""How did you get it?"""

"When I've had a bad day I remind myself that I'm a straight white guy. Then I high five some dudes and we destroy an ecosystem or some shit."

"I named my WiFi after my last girlfriend because it's never fully connected with me. And also because I caught my neighbour using it."

"How much hate does it take to qualify as a ""hater""? I hate tons of stuff."

"Cauliflower is just cabbage rocking an afro."

"How do you cure a basic bitch? Give her some acid."

"When I die... I want to go peacefully in my sleep. Like my father. Not screaming and yelling. Like his passengers"