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Joke of the Day

"Hubby wanted to start the new year out with a bang - So I shot him.."

"How do they fit so many islands into such a small bottle of dressing??!!"

"Marriage is a three ring circus... ...first there is the engagement ring, then the wedding ring and then comes the suffering."

"Life is like a box of chocolates It doesn't last as long for fat people."

"Why does it take longer to make a snow woman than a Snowman? Because you have to hollow out the head."

"Today I had a second helping of hummus. I was arrested for double hummus-ide."

"It was four months into my relationship that I found out my girlfriend was a communist She started giving me red flags"

"So I bought some shoes off my drug dealer. And I'm not sure what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day."

"Homeless Yelp Review: Dumpster behind grocery on Calhoun & Fairfax BARELY had any rotting fruit. Owner chased me off with a bat. 0 stars."

"How do you make seven even? Take the s off."