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Joke of the Day

"Sorry Satan, but I'm selling my soul to Buddah. You gotta be fucking stupid to pass up on a tasty offer like ""free Chinese food for life."""

"What's a pirates favorite letter? You would think R, but pirates really have a passion of the seas."

"If you go to the zoo and he doesn't help you steal a monkey, he's not that into you."

"Genesis is my favorite rock group who've been around long enough to write a chapter in the bible."

"If white guys are day drinking, it's inevitable that they're going to start wrestling at some point later that night."

"How do you make a tissue dance ? Put a little boogie in it !"

"Testicle. It's life in a nutshell."

"It's mean to give a homeless person money for food without giving him money for a phone too... How do you expect him to Instargram the food?"

"What do you say to a man with no legs? Nothing, he'll shoot you."

"I was in a band One of our roadies was a German man. There was a Czech one too. Czech 1-2, Czech 1-2"