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Joke of the Day

"Did you know you can actually WIN Instagram by taking a picture of your feet next to your dinner at sunset?"

"Which animal makes the best pie? A human."

"I can't see those guns made on 3D printers catching on. If HP make the cartridges, it will be cheaper to buy an AK-47."

"Did you hear about the new emo website? Check it out it's www.emo.com/wrists"

"Why do old men need Viagra? Because they are screwing old women!"

"My neighbor got an iPad! I know this because I always steal his mail. My new iPad is awesome!"

"All I'm saying is that the cheese grater wouldn't have 4 sides if they wanted you to wash it after EVERY use."

"Have you heard about Marx's tomb? They say it's a Communist plot"

"Q: How do you catch a unique rabbit? A: Unique up on him."

"Toronto Mayor Rob Ford is in the news. He claims he found a way to bring in $50 million for Toronto. America will pay him to take Justin Bieber back."