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Joke of the Day

"Do you know the hardest part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.."

"I'm not surprised Kristen Stewart couldn't act faithful. She can't act happy, sad, frightened, mad, shocked or aroused either."

"In the updated version of The Sixth Sense, Bruce Willis figures out he's dead when he sees his name trending on Twitter."

"Request: Give me your best wedding joke! (jokes with puns are absolutely acceptable)"

"In the old days when people knocked on the door, you could hide. Now you have to disconnect from internet and turn off cell phones."

"Todays stats: My 3yr old got pissed off with me because I couldn't stop the wind."

"I believe the Pope did what all Catholics are told to do. Pull out early."

"Spent the day attempting crazy driving stunts because I forgot to read the fine print at the bottom of a car commercial."

"I could be wrong, but an escape goat strikes me as an awfully inefficient getaway plan."

"Did you hear about the accountant who daydreams about being an actuary? He craved more risk."