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Joke of the Day

"Why do pop artists hate shoe shopping? They have too many ft. *edit for spelling"

"Just finished building doors for my fish. I'm highly skilled in the field of carp-entry."

"Trump after Obama is like Umbridge after Dumbledore. R.I.P"

"Theoretically, you can't really complain if there's a pubic hair on your everything bagel."

"Did you hear about how they spotted a Nazi in the sea? It's okay, it's just adolfin"

"A grasshopper walks into a bar And the bartender says ""I have a shot named after you"" The grasshopper replies ""you have a shot named Steve?!"" My bartender friend told me this, thought I should share"

"Music is like people, the black notes are the fastest"

"Seeing another person with synesthesia... is like music to my eyes."

"What's a terrorist's favorite type of game? An RPG"

"I told my SO that now Movember is over they should shave their mustache. She didn't take it very well."