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Joke of the Day

"MY AUNT: All we can do now is pray DOCTOR: Oh nice so I should put down this cardio thoracic surgical instrument? We're good here?"

"When you're fast enough to be at two spots at the same time. *Fat"

"My dog can eat more condoms than your honor student."

"I need a less intrusive addiction than Twitter so I started using meth this morning."

"Why does Naruto vomit after every meal? He's **BULIMIC!**"

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Rasta Barbie ...she's got a tie-dyed t-shirt dreadlocks and reggae CD; rolling papers sold separately"

"What shoes do pedophiles wear? White Vans"

"What sound does a pinewood derby car make when you rev it? Wooooooden Woooooooden Woooooden!"

"The Holocaust Wasn't That Bad ""The holocaust wasn't that bad."" ""Of course it was!"" ""I'm going to go out and kill a million Jews and one clown."" ""Why the clown?"" ""See, no one cares about the Jews."""

"The best curve on a woman is her smile ...Hahahaha lmao! No I'm kidding, it's her boobs."