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Joke of the Day

"What do you do if you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologise"

"Why does the New York Times hire Jews? So they can put out a paper on December 26th."

"Pretty sure the guy who named them ""walkie talkies"" got fired before he could name other military equipment."

"I just had a phone call saying I'd won 250 cash or two tickets to an Elvis tribute night. It said Press 1 for the money or 2 for the show......"

"Q: How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb? A: Twenty. 1 to hold the bulb 2 to turn the ladder and 17 to be on the guest list."

"Am sitting in horrible traffic, but fortunately someone is beeping their horn so we should be on the move soon."

"The Republican Presidential Candidates"

"Learning about frequency is so boring ... It literally Hertz."

"What's a ghost like to drink on the weekend? Booze (Kill me now)"

"the fondue...? you mean, my drinking cheese?"