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Joke of the Day

"What did Tony the Tiger say to the kids playing baseball? ""Theeeeeeeeey Never expect the Spanish Inquisition!"""

"This cracked me up at work tonight! Did you hear about the famous actress that slit her throat tonight? What's her name? Reese... Reese Witherspoon? No with a knife"

"They finally created a generic viagra. Micoxaphlopin is the next big thing."

"I don't know the lyrics to any of Pitbull's songs, but in my defense, I'm not really convinced he does either."

"Why do they say I'm black in the bedroom? I'm fast."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Algy ! Algy who ! Algy-bra !"

"I removed the shell of my racing snail to make it go faster. But it just made it more sluggish."

"Two hipsters walked into a bar. One did it before it was cool and the second did it ironically."

"Hillary's so crooked... she needs a Kaine for support."

"What do you call Neil DeGrasse Tyson with champagne poured over his chest? An Astro-fizzy-tits."