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Joke of the Day

"That's pretty cool that Mary Shelley wrote Heidi Montag's biography before she was even born. #Frankenstien"

"Why can't a hermit be a vegan, go to a CrossFit gym, or not eat gluten? Because he can't tell anyone about it."

"...and tonight's final jeopardy category is Greek Mythology *giant centaur snorts and smiles at the other two contestants*"

"Old fire fighters never quit They just do asbestos they can."

"Today, my son asked me why girls always pee sitting down I told him it's because they're lazy Not necessarily a joke but kinda funny nonetheless."

"If puns were people, where do all the bad ones go after they die? www.reddit.com/r/jokes/new"

"What do womens' breasts & toy trains have in common? There're intended for children, but it's the fathers that wind up playing with them."

"I leave notes around the house to remind me of things I need to do, like ""Pick up milk"" or ""Pay gas bill"" or ""Stop wasting your life away"""

"What's green and red and goes 100 mph? A frog in a blender."

"Q: What is the only thing worse than an incompetent liberal President? A: A competent liberal President."