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Joke of the Day

"...and tonight's final jeopardy category is Greek Mythology *giant centaur snorts and smiles at the other two contestants*"

"My girlfriend got a tattoo of a shell on her thigh Every time I lay my ear on it I can smell the sea."

"How do polish people show gratitude? They say thansk."

"Meanwhile on Facebook, Susan is doing a quiz, to find out what kind of sea monster, her Ex is."

"The only reason I watch political speeches is cause I'm hoping there's gonna be a sniper."

"Be nice to bacteria... they're the only culture some people have."

"My friend just sent me this one. > To the person who stole my Microsoft Office, I will find you! > You have my Word!"

"Follow your dream, then Unfollow it if it doesn't Follow you back within 48 hours."

"I slept on my neck funny and today I will be turning my whole body like Batman every time I have to look at something."

"What's the only painful car rental company? Hertz."