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Joke of the Day

"There's no such thing as ""elevator etiquette"" buddy. Just enjoy your back scratch."

"LPT: When cooking chicken, it needs a lot of support Alone, it tastes absolutely fowl."

"I went to bed last night and my brother came out of the closet and scared the shit out of me, I forgot we were playing hide and seek..."

"How to tell if your wife is mad at you 1. She is"

"What do you call a dinosaur having brunch? Tea-Rex"

"Using double negatives results in the meaning being positive. So, should using double positives should give a negative meaning? Yeah right."

"[maintains eye contact while slowly rearranging the dishwasher]"

"I broke up with my girlfriend when I found out she only has 4 toes on each foot.... Turns out I'm lack-toes intolerant.."

"The bartender says..... ""We don't serve faster-than-light particles here!"" A tachyon enters a bar."

"Can antelopes get married? No, they cantaloupe."