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Joke of the Day
"What's red, bloody and hangs of the back of a train? Miscarriage."
Next Joke
"Is it 5 seconds from when it hits the floor or when I see it? I just noticed a skittle under my desk. I don't remember eating skittles."
"I came into some wealth recently, but it turns out my bank doesn't accept that kind of deposit."
"I've said this to countless medical professionals. Nobody's laughed yet. ""Does my chart say what blood type I have? I can never remember."" ""O+"" ""Oh... [insert troll face] Positive?"""
"Steps on how to survive being stranded on a dessert island. 1) Check spelling. 2) If correct, enjoy."
"You will never ever EVER get all the sand out of a suitcase you bring on vacation. EVER."
"How do you greet a three-headed monster? Hi, hi, hi."
"Always leave a bad date by politely spilling your drink on the floor, and telling him your water broke."
"My dad is sadly hooked up to a life support machine. My mother says he is the most switched-on man in our town."
"Why can't redditors sew? Because the thread has been locked by a moderator"