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Joke of the Day

"I've said this to countless medical professionals. Nobody's laughed yet. ""Does my chart say what blood type I have? I can never remember."" ""O+"" ""Oh... [insert troll face] Positive?"""

Next Joke
 
"Dad to kid: ""Connor, eat your food!"" ""Eat your food!"" ""Eat your food!"" ""Eat your food!"" Me: *turns around, eats all of kid's food*"
"*Queen bee in hive* ""You, go pollinate flowers"" ""You, go make some honey"" ""You, go buzz around some humans and ruin their picnic lol"""
"You know you're on drugs when you're talking to your kids about drugs and you don't have any kids."
"Q: You are traveling into the past, what one thing would you bring back? SEXY. I am so getting an A on this History paper."
"What's the difference between Iron Man And Iron Woman? Iron Man is a superhero, Iron Woman is a command."
"What's 5,000 lbs and sexually confused? A Bi-noceros"
"What is a mattress' favorite season? Spring."
"There's a sale at the Maul Everything's half off"
"What did the blind, innocent, sweet, paraplegic 7 year old boy get for his birthday? Cancer."