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Joke of the Day

"I had a reaction to some nuts the other day.. ""These are a bit hairy."""

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"What do you call a nun in a wheelchair Virgin Mobil"
"I'd be so much more successful if some of my ancestors had just married better."
"What is the difference... Q: What is the difference between leaves and a car? A: One you brush and rake, the other you rush and brake. Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Computational_humor"
"I like Jews how I like my cookies. Cooked in an oven"
"It's great to get laid, It's awesome to get off, but damn it sucks to get laid off."
"What do you call a torturer who says a lot of puns. A PUNisher"
"Did it Hurt When You Fell From Heaven Straight Into Hell?"
"[Amphibian Playground] BULLFROG: look at all u lil toad nerds TOAD: help! a BULLYfrog! TEACHER SNAKE: i'll handle this *eats everyone*"
"What do you call an ISIS member who loves himself? A nISISist"