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Joke of the Day

"What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed? Nothing."

"Whole Foods added a 10 items or less checkout line as if anyone can afford to buy more than 10 items at a Whole Foods."

"A chicken stood in my way at the grocery store It was the biggest Cock Block of my life"

"What's the difference between an epileptic oysterman and a hooker with diarrhea? One shucks between fits..."

"What is an alcoholic's favorite book? Tequila Mockingbird"

"I'm calling it now: I'm going to discover the cure for blindness and make billions of dollars someday. You'll all see."

"Why did the acronym buff decide to go join the etymologists instead? He heard they had PIE."

"Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender yells, ""we don't serve your type in here."""

"The hardest thing about working in a restaurant is that your throat is always dry from spitting in everyone's food."

"Justin Bieber made a racist joke when he was 15. Quick, someone give him $2 billion for his basketball team to teach him a lesson."