201765

Joke of the Day

"Car insurance companies got it right Don't date women under 25!"

"Q: Why do men float better than women? A: Because they are scum."

"My Wife's nickname for me is ""Microsoft"" because I'm good with computers. RIGHT HONEY? Hold on guys, she's not done laughing."

"The impossibility of accepting the offer of a quick drink without first pretending to check your watch"

"What do you call a dog riding in a submarine? A subwoofer."

"Why is George Bush always on the bottom when having sex? Because he can only fuck up!"

"How do drugs end up in prison? They get smuggled in by some asshole."

"A magnet walks into a bar...., what does he order? Nothing... he's still stuck to the entrance."

"I used to not get on with my mother-in-law but over the last few months I've developed quite an attachment for her. It goes over her head and a strap comes down under her chin to keep her mouth shut!"

"Where are the baby leeks? In it's nappy! (diaper for my american friends) (I work in a supermarket, this is how I pass the time)"