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Joke of the Day

"What is Newton's fifth law of motion? If you run around a tree at the speed of light you can literally fuck yourself."

"I like my slaves like I like my coffee... Free"

"My friend has a habit of dropping things. It's getting out of hand."

"A woman asked me how I view lesbianism the other day... Apparently ""in HD"" was not an acceptable answer."

"I'm a tire in real life It's a wheel hassle."

"Son of Sam I Am, a serial killer who targets people who won't try new foods."

"I just want a girl that's nice and sweet that doesn't require a lot of money and I can dunk them in milk wait, a cookie, I want a cookie"

"What does it taste like to eat out an 85 year old woman? Depends"

"whats the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? ...one is a little lighter"

"A black man and a Mexican are in a car , who's driving it ? The Police"