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Joke of the Day
"""My goodness, you've grown a foot since I last saw you..."" ...said the doctor in Chernobyl."
Next Joke
"What's the square root of sixty-nine? Eight-something!"
"A guy doesn't go into a bar... Unaware, the bartender continues serving drinks to other people."
"I saved my husband's life insurance company 1 million dollars by switching to xanax."
"I went to the garden centre today and bought a Christmas Tree. The assistant asked me, ""Will you be putting that up yourself?"" I replied, ""No, you sick fuck. I'll be putting it up in my living room."""
"Q: Why can't blondes put in light bulbs? A: They keep breaking them with the hammers."
"A woman walked into a library and asked for a book on euphemisms. So the librarian took her up the rear aisle and let her have it."
"VA Nurse joke What is the difference between a VA nurse and a bullet? * A bullet can draw blood * A bullet can be fired * A bullet can only kill one person"
"Adulthood is the moment you switch from taking the occasional drug to trip out, to taking the occasional drug to feel normal."
"[Interview with a time traveller] ""What's life like in the year 3000?"" It's pretty much the same as 2015 but you can download a towel"