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Joke of the Day
"If life gives you lemons, you migth be lysdexic"
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"Arnold Schwarzenegger goes to a Halloween party. The theme is ""Dead Classical Composers""... When asked who he'll dress up as, Arnold says, ""I'll be Bach."""
"If someone approaches you and offers you a Black Eyed Peas album, remain calm. You have just encountered a member of the Black Eyed Peas."
"When I was asked what my five year plan is I responded... I couldn't tell you, I only have 2020 vision. pm me if you want my address to come murder me in my sleep for this."
"Why did the alcoholic quit his acting career when the audience jeered at him? He couldn't handle his boos."
"What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live underground, apart from the eagle."
"What's the difference between a woman and a washing machine? A washing machine doesn't follow you around stalking you after you toss a load in it."
"Snow White: Someday my prince will come Prince Charming: I swear this has never happened before"
"Reddit is really a green community. considering all the recycled content on here. [](http://ftgtvgbyhnjkmjnhbgvfgbybhjnkmnhbg.com)"
"What is a pirate's least favorite letter? Dear Sir/Ma'am, We are cutting your internet connection due to the following reasons: 1. Illegal Downloading"