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Joke of the Day

"I would rather have Bill Cosby as President than Donald Trump.. because if America is gonna get fucked for 4 years I wanna be asleep when it happens."

"Where do cannibals get their vegetables from? the coma ward."

"Last night a kid came ""trick or treating"" at my place dressed as Gloria Gaynor. At first I was afraid."

"I've survived 23 years by pretending to be smarter than I am. I tell people I excel in Academia but I can't even point Academia out on a map"

"What's the difference between a terrorist camp and a school? No idea man, im just flying the drone."

"Yo momma so fat, when she wants to take a bath... She fills up the tub and THEN turns on the water."

"I had to take my son's dirty diaper off today. I don't know why I was wearing it in the first place."

"Shakira molests air and calls it dancing."

"Diet plan: make friends fatter"

"The first time I ever player lacrosse it was fairly stressful every time after that was fairly re-laxing"