62745

Joke of the Day

"When I see you, I'm a 10... On the [Mohs scale](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mohs_scale_of_mineral_hardness#Minerals)."

"Heard a newsreader relaying the news that Richie Benaud had died and I thought to myself ""What a fine delivery that was"""

"[at gym] *spends 45 minutes untangling headphones *drops phone, squats to pick it up Phew! Good workout! *leaves"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Artichoke ! Artichoke who ! Artichoke when he swallowed his yo-yo !"

"I'm not only the woman your Mother warned you about, I'm the one your Father highly recommended."

"Oprah and Hilary have a backup plan if trump wins The catcher in the rye is going to be featured in Oprah's book club"

"Where does a russian bird sleep? IN A COMMU-NEST"

"Poor Pascal... he gets no girls at all... but at least his name is the SI derived unit of pressure used to quantify internal pressure, stress, ... Coincidence?"

"Why was the guy from 127 Hours arrested for espionage? He was proven guilty of providing arms to Iraq"

"It's great how you have legs that can take you away from a conversation when you don't feel like listening to people anymore"