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Joke of the Day

"The more time you spend with your lover, the more you become like them. That explains why I'm so childish."

"Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes? Toes go in first!"

"Saw @justinbieber on a piece of toast. Am I going to hell?"

"When's the best time to go skydiving? Fall."

"What happens when a dick meets a hardass? Well... Fuck."

"NURSE: *bursts in* Dr., come quick! DR DOG: CHRIST, JULIE! Don't you knock?!? *hides magazine of sexy Labradoodles being sprayed with hoses*"

"Hey you know what will go good with all that beer you just drank? Social media and a camera phone!"

"If the Terminator was female the line would have been, ""I might be back, I haven't decided yet."""

"Parents, forget about teaching your kids about the birds and the bees. Teach your kids the difference between their, they're and there."

"Why is it important to have plenty of help when changing a light bulb? Many hands make light work."