62652

Joke of the Day

"I wouldn't want to live forever. I don't even want to stay at a party past eleven."

"I'm going to be very busy in the afterlife. the list of people I'm going to haunt grows everyday."

"FIRST MONSTER: Am I late for dinner? SECOND MONSTER: Yes everyone's been eaten."

"Tried to prank my Tibetan Buddhist friend. I tried to prank my Buddhist friend from Tibet, I told him the Dalai Lama had died. He was skeptical and said ill bereave it when I see it."

"I lasted 1 hour and 30 seconds while having sex last night... Thank you daylight savings!"

"I had to stop my blonde sister from eating pickles I got tired of having to pry the damn jar off of her head"

"What computer says ""hello"" A Dell"

"How do You find the worst joke of the internet? You reddit."

"Tried pushing her against the wall to kiss her like all you guys suggested. Put her head right through the drywall. Goddam cheap motels."

"Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She caused frequent blue-screens and IRQ time-out errors."