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Joke of the Day

"Is there some organization that evaluates the quality of shea butter? Because if so, it could have Fifty Grades of Shea."

"If I'm murdered, I hope I'm able to write out the killer's name in blood and then ""sucks"" underneath"

"Why did the chicken cross the road? **To kill its self** This is no joke **#CHICKENLIVESMATTER**"

"I just made an April Fool's joke. Too soon?"

"Next time you're swallowed by a whale, stand up through the blowhole like it's a sunroof on a limo. Throw your arms up. Have some fun!"

"I just ate a silica salt packet and I've been using a plastic bag as a toy because I live life on the motherfucking edge."

"Occasionally, a true friend gives his paw not his hand..."

"Him: I just want a stable relationship. Me: Yeah, horses are cool. Him: ........ Flirting is hard, you guys."

"nice try walmart, like im gonna spend $20 on a skeleton mask when i could easily just peel the flesh and muscle off my face for free"

"In the 50's the pot called the kettle a different word."